Naked Man in Bradner Tree Caper

8/12/2016

By Russ Walsh - Strange Events in Bradner... Also known as the Naked Man in the Bradner Tree caper!
Bradner residents were concerned for Leo and Suzi Kim's well-being on Wednesday morning when police and ambulance showed up at the Bradner store. Turns out Leo and Suzi were just fine, but their daughter was somewhat distraught after a near-naked man fell 60' feet from a tree right in front of her while she took a break behind the store.

He'd apparently spent the night in the tree, managing, in the process to lose most of his clothes, and about mid-morning fell from a considerable height to the ground below, right in front of Suzi's daughter who had gone into the woods behind the store for a smoke. Clearly, the warnings on cigarette packages need updating!

The police were called. And an ambulance, as well, because the man sustained considerable injuries in his fall. Rumours range from a broken pelvis to broken ribs. Perhaps both. The strange thing is, while the man landed on the ground beneath the tall pine tree wearing only underpants, his pants can be seen about 60' up in the tree, where they still remain. Nobody, it seems, is willing to scale the tree to retrieve the pants and possibly other articles of clothing. Hint: If readers are in need of a pair of pants, one can be had by simply climbing the cedar tree behind the Bradner Store.

The above photo shows the spot where the man fell to earth. And a shot of the pants high up in the tree - circled in order to make it easier for the reader to identify them among the foliage.

At the time of writing we are still unable to determine several things.

Why anyone would want to spend what appears to be an entire night in a tree behind the Bradner Store
Why anyone, in the process of spending the night in said tree would disrobe, leaving his pants dangling 60' above the ground?
What caused the man to lose his grip and tumble to the ground just as Miss Kim arrived on scene for a smoke. (Is this perhaps one of those nasty side-affects of smoking they warn us about?)

The man in the tree caper may be linked to an overnight auto accident on Bradner Road. No confirmation here. Hard to get anything confirmed these days. Nobody wants to admit anything. But here's a photo of a set of keys recovered by Miss Kim from the base of the tree....